FMR. U. S PRESIDENT GEORGE WASHINGTON BUSH HAS CONVERTED TO ISLAM

BREAKING NEWS –
Former US
President George W
Bush Converts To
Islam, Credits
Hamza Yusuf
JULY 7, 2014 | MULLAHLIAMADDEEN | 1
COMMENT
In a press conference today, former US
president George W Bush announced
to the world that he has decided to
convert to the Islamic faith. This
amazing conversion story has shocked
both the global Muslim community and
the American public. Bush appeared
before the media, along side his long
time friend and confidante Shaikh
Hamza Yusuf, to tell of his conversion
and to answer any questions from
those in attendance.
Describing how he felt after he had
embraced the faith, Bush said,
“Well, in the words of the great James
Brown, I feel good. Like I knew that I
would. I feel good. So good. So good. I
got you Allah.”
The former commander and chief
continued,
“After takin’ my shay-hay-day, I feel
such a sense of relief, such a sense of
calm. Like the calm after the storm
when the rescue teams come. Like the
calm after Katrina, y’all know what I
mean?”
A reflective Bush continued to tell of
his long time affection for Islam,
“I always said, even while I occupied
my office and Iraq, that Islam was a
religion of peace, and I really meant
that. I know I lied about other things,
but that was one of the true ones. Y’all
are so nice, an’ welcoming. Almost like
a whole religion of Texans. It really
changed my life when I found out
white people could be Muzlums too. Its
like I learned somethin’ or somethin’.
Its hard to express what I’m feelin’ in
words y’all will understand. Knocked
my socks off, tell ya what. Knocked ’em
clean off. Its like someone just came in
and turned all the lights on. I was in
complete darkness pretty much before,
but now I feel pretty happy. I feel fresh
like a new born baby boy.”
When asked if it was his own self
studying of the religion that had
brought him to his decision, Bush
stated,
“Well to be honest, not really, not
really no. I mean, I have been a friend
for a long time with my buddy Hamza
here,” the former president said as he
slapped Shaikh Hamza Yusuf on the
knee in a jovial manner.
Speaking of his long time mentor, Bush
said,
“I give a lot of credit to Shaikh Hamza,
or Hammy as I like to call him. Hammy
an’ me go way back, and he’s helped
me a lot you know, teachin’ me the
basics of the deeni-oolla. How’s my
teej-wad Hammy?”
Shaikh Hamza Yusuf smiled, nodding
his head in the affirmative. The
respected California based scholar
offered much praise for the newly
converted Bush,
“I have known brother George for over
a decade now. I can remember the
first time I met him in the Oval Office.
There was just something about him, I
could see noor just pouring off his
face,” the Shaikh said as he began to
tear up, “I thought… (sniff), Wallahi…
Huwa min Ahlil Jannah!… (sniff)… and
I made du’a for him ‘Oh Allah, give
this beautiful man faith in You.’ And
here he is today, he has said his
testimony in front of two witnesses.
His whole past life of sins are totally
wiped clean, he has a fresh start. He is
totally forgiven, completely innocent,
as the day he was born.”
“Yeah, I like that part,” chuckled the
former president. “Cuz I’ve made some
real doozies in my day. But its all
smooth sailin’ from here on in to Janet
Faradawzi. That’s the Muzlum word
for heaven. I don’t know who Janet
was, maybe Adam’s third wife or
somethin’.”
Among the gathered reporters was
Muntadhar al-Zaidi, an Iraqi journalist
and broadcaster who infamously threw
his size 10 shoe at the then President
several years prior. Al-Zaidi addressed
the newly converted Bush saying,
“Mr. President, I am so overjoyed that
you have embraced the true religion,
and you have come to your senses. I
just want to say that please accept my
apology for throwing my size 10 shoe
at you, and for calling you a dog. It is
really wrong for a Muslim to hurt
another Muslim, so I just wanted to ask
your pardon for that lack of good
manners.”
“Well here’s the deal Zaidi,” Bush said,
“I sure do forgive you. I mean, if Allah
can forgive all the things I did to your
country of Iraq, and all the things I did
in Afghaniland, I think I can find it in
my heart to forgive a Muzlum brother.
So al ham-doo-la-la-la. So long as ya
aren’t one of them shi’ites, its all good
bud.”
With that, the former leader of the free
world ended the press conference with
prayers of peace and a heartfelt thank
you,
“Thank y’all so much for being so kind,
really means somethin’ to me. Wa
lakaam asalaam wa rami-toola wa
abracadbratuhu. I’m still workin’ on
my teej-wad, but y’all know what I
mean. Peace.”
reported by the Mullah Liam ad-Deen
Team

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